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.Thursday, September 10, 2009 ' 8:08 PM Y
;all the things i'll never say.

; and when the rest of the world walks out, i'll still be here;


so tell me i'm not totally selfish for wanting him all to myself.

ok i'd rather no one tagged on my board-ie asking about this post? it's one of those reflective kind. you know; the kind that is more so meant for the author than the readers. so yep; no questions, could you guys do that? i just want to get this out of my system; tick tack tick tack. i mean, for all you know- this could not even be true. maybe it's a fabricated story to keep yer' hooked :D
maybe not.

so if you're tagging (which i hope you are!), it's gonna be something like 'hi how are you', 'the weather's fine, ' 'have you seen my cat?' okay-ish.

same goes for whoever's involved in this hooky/ the person i'm typing about. i don't want you proclaiming stuff to the world and revealing your identity; hoho this sounds very zorro-ish. i don't know why. i think it's probably because he's masked too. like spidey. remember the upside-down kiss from mary jane? har-har. she did the whole roll-down-the-mask-but-not-quite thing.
okay so read my lips- no tags asking about this; go boil some carrots instead. but do tag about eg: the weather, your cat, boiling carrots.
like i was saying, tell me i'm not totally selfish for wanting him all to myself.
but okay i know it is. no need reassurance from you- even i know i'm being totally ridiculous. like, overreacting. but i'm not backing down because i think a girl is entitled for ridiculous overreactions every once in a while.
it was awesome while it lasted. and it lasted till late in the night, and continued on somemore. where else would you get such soul-baring funnn? and well, admittedly; who' else would i have done it with other than you?
this is a brand-new feeling. somewhere between queasy and oh-shit.
i mean, who am i trying to kid? after all that we've said, after patting your shoulder to say it's alright; i can't suddenly yank you away when it comes true, can i? not that i'm gonna have much say in the matter.
i don't know how ecstatic you are over this; and you should be- but i don't understand your reassurance that everything's going to be okay. scold me for being childish if you want- it seems so too. but tell me this; if it's all just a chunk of childish assumptions- why does it hurt so much?
it's not supposed to, is it? i must have done something wrong along the way.
gina, gina, gina; once again you've gone and got yourself too involved--
what's the big deal? i'm probably making a mountain out of a molehill (ewwyuck), but i'm a girl. and girls, like i said, are entitled to overreactions. it's kind of part of us. but whatever.
and i feel obligated to point out that i never do follow my to-do lists; ever.
this is so silly i could laugh at myself. laugh at how the world is crumbling away. how the horns are beeping in traffic outside my window; how the people are failing and dashing through the streets trying to juggle mobile phones and cappuccino cups; laugh at how everything can change in the blink of an eye. i don't know why all that is relevant.
and at the end of the day, there's just something i don't get. we've been preparing for this day for so long- you& me. i should know the roles by now; i could memorise it in my sleep. we talked about this day non-stop; so many times i lost count after the first twelve times. so then why,
why when it's suddenly here; why when the blackout curtains are drawn up- i am suddenly frozen in my step? i don't know the words from any dram of recollection at all?
oh wait- i do know why.
this ain't my show, is it? all this time, i must have been searching and priding and poking around to see if there's somewhere i could fit into the show.but there isn't any space left. and you know it like i do- fame is fleeting.
oh look- the spotlight's pointing at her now; what can i say? this don't keep her waiting;
i'm not usually all that selfish/ protective about people- i'm a bit appalled at myself. in fact, for someone who has talked through with you about this, it wouldnt make any sense for me to not want you to do it.
i guess you can say i didn't expect it to feel that way, i was kinda taken aback.
but when life comes around and dump a bucket full of fallen stars on your lap, you can't do much, really.
it'd be totally corny if i said i want you to be happy, and all that shit. i'm incapable of that corny-gooey-muck, sorry. but when you've been waiting all your life (sorta) for this, i'm not gonna stand in your way, no.
don't mind me. people come and people go. we could just pretend that nothing's changed, but i won't allow myself that sort of disillusion.

;i really don't know what i should ask of you anymore.


tag about the carrots instead, people. let me absorb myself in my thoughts.
i know i'm overreacting; but let me have my moment

dammit.


oh baby, i walk down memory lane because i love running into you;
; now i know that tears can't solve anything;







WHO, ME?;
GINA
15

hullo,
most days, there isn't a rain cloud.
really.
i dissect myself here, sometimes.
and i usually do strange things to my correction tapes.
i would be fulfilling all my childhood dreams now,
if i hadn't forgotten all of them.
i'm afraid of many, many things
but i'm not afraid to be afraid of them.
i have a nose, a mouth and two eyes.
but of course, this is the internet.
i could be an anorexic penguin or something and nobody would even know.

take everything with a pinch of salt
(and a slight dash of sugar).




!SCREAM OUT.Y

yada yada yada. oncemore.


WHO, ME?Y

hello nice to meet you too :D


ooh; funky.

` i am sweet &and sour fourteen. and i want to be twentyone. but im okay with fourteen too.sorta.(:

` singlicious(: but unavailable. ><

` RSSIAN ;SIXONE07 .DHS.TWOIDYLLA.

` i don't post often unless i'm on a roll. but you didnt have to know that

` i moodswing like any other girl; but my moodswings are really, swinging.

` i love ferb. and oliver james. and channing tatum. one has green hair; the other two don't. O:

` my future is ZOMG™. or at least i seriously hope so.

` somethin' bout me-i absolutely adore chickflicks& chicklits.
those who don't believe in love&happyendings can go boil their tawny little heads.

` i hate posting about my day.

` i hate (too) posting about trips in day one, day two, day three formats.

` i secretly want a pure breed pony like any other girl. sorta.

` i love lists/listing. except when it comes to life. unpredictable is my middle name. among many others.

` i hate waiting in line.

` i love it when my turn in the line comes. especially if i'm buying food.

` chocolate is my middle name, my life and my substitube for just about anything. no shit.

` candy is mediocre. sweet stuff and what not. (chocolate doesnt count as candy.)

` next year i'll be fifteen. taylor swift sang about that before. O:

` when i'm sixteeeen, i can swipe my card at the dudes infront of the theater for nc16 shows(: sweet!

` i hate watching movies online but i do it anyway. desperation drives a girl forth.

` gachk. i'm not usually that desperate. it must be some good show, hunh.

` smileys are an absolutely must. and they do not count as punctuation sheesh.

` tiaras and toppings- a must if i ever become royal.

` i am. kinda. teehees.

` writing is my middle name. creative arts and what nots.

` colours maketh a woman so if you have a thing against them, steer clear!

` tatty teddy's aweseomly cute. all abandoned bears should end up like him.

` i don't have a favourite colour; unless pen-colour determines so; pink&purple wins hands down

` someday i will fall in love. do not laugh; it is very unfunny.

` and yes, i often burst out into song.

` i bounce around alot; gravity can't keep me dooooown!

` the pen is invariably mightier than the sword.

` i habour the ability to blast your brains over the floor but i practice regular self control.
most of the times.

` i am not-so-secretly in love with whipped cream. i lick that stuff when no one is looking/ infront of the whole world. who gives a shit, really?

` i love the way you blend dairy products and chocolate bits and cream into awesome double chocolate frappes.

` i crave for doublecheese burgers once every week. at situated times.

` i am a romance writer in the making. sorta.
for those who don't believe in love- i hope you fall head over heels one day and i'll be there to say 'i told you so.' *snarl*

` happyendings are usually overrated.
but not entirely impossible.

` a perfect guy, on the other hand; drat what are the odds?

` with music, comes dancing. or at least embarrasing, futile attempts that will not see the light of day(:

` with dancing, comes crazy, bubbled up giggling. but pretend i didnt say anything.

` i feel woozy and slurred after i pop small triangular pink pills. just so you know.

` maybe i'll even go blond someday.

` sometimes my life is a bad sitcom. mismatched ironies; cliches and what nots.

` i don't drink cooler/bottled mineral water unless absolutely necessary.

` i devour books. and i'm never truly full.

` correction tapes too. there never seem to be enough for me graah.

` i have a thing for skinnyties(:

` i love anything in mini/bite-sized; most of the times.

` i find myself subconsciously owning a heckload of red objects. heaven knows why O:

` i adore late night talks with special people.

` i honestly can't give good advice and everything i predict screws up/ doesn't come true. you have been warned.

` i love walking&talking. long dreamy stretches that edge on forever.

` i can't stand cryptic people but i love being cryptic.

well,
i dance in the shower and sing in the rain; i twirl around people and run towards food; fall head over heels for anything particularly cute with a smart mouth; and eat hotdog buns before the actual hotdogs. i have an overactive imagination and crazy action-packed dreams.
i hate using umbrellas and got tangled up in a disposible raincoat once.
my spelling is screwed up.
cucumbers and celery are exceptionally unappealing.
i never wanted to be a disney princess when i was young. still don't.
when i'm crazy about somethin' i go all out.
i'm only organized for certain things.
i will absolutely not tell you who the posters in my room are of.
i have a thing against floral prints
i do alot of nuts& bolts when i'm alone(:
i'm abit freaked by cats.
i have a thing for ribbons;
piano is my other profession.
i have a thing for black.
i eat tomatoes& apples whole& raw.
i can't recite the alphabet backwards since i'm struggling with forward already.
i'm half-nocturnal. sometimes full.
i love doodling. it's my part-time occupation.
daydreaming would be the full-time one.
i can't ever remember my dreams at all and half the time it annoys the shyt out of me.
i can't learn languages. seriously.
i get into heated arguments/ name-calling with the voice in my head. usually cranky snapping on my part :X
i cannot watch horror films. so sue me.
i love tracing paper and sketchy markers.
i am not quite so fragile-.-
there are two sides of me; the other only some has seen(:
i am truly not all glitter and rainbows.
i am a sucker for romance and what nots.
my evil twin runs loose somewhere.
so whatever it is; it's probably her fault.
i am me.
i'm kinda side to side. fickle and cranky one hour; happy and intoxicated the next.
the weight of the world is never on my shoulders.
it doesn't take much to blow me away;
but it takes a lifetime to comprehend me.
even for myself.
;/ especially for myself.
` i do alot of crazy shit.


but you know; it's a phrase. we'll grow out of it, they say. it'll pass eventually and they will all grow up, people say. but,.
a phrase? maybe.
what if these are the best part of our lives?
people come and go and be judgmental about a lot of things; but it's not a phrase, this time.
it's just me and you.
against the world.
life is so very short and should be wasted on chocolate and good books.
sing in the shower
and dance in the rain.
occasionally;
break the rules and bring down the house!
ohyes, we rule the world; phrase or not.

this ain't entirely a phrase; this is just us.
who we are.
may the memories never end.
not in this lifetime.
or the next.



FOR TEENAGERS WHO WILL LIVE ON AND ON!
>toast<
` and yes; we're forever

DOORWAY TO NARNIA;Y
TPPPPP(:
HANNAH(:
ONEIDYLLA♥
SIXONE07♥
JQ (:
REENA(:
MIKOO(:
RACHEL(:
CANDICEE(:
AMANDA.w (:.
SEEHIAN(:
BRENDAN(:
YULIAN(:
JOEY(:
SIQI(:
WEILUN(:
MEILIN (:
ZHIXIANN(:
L.SIHUI(:
ISAAC(:

tad messy. i'll arrange the dudes&dudettes next time O:


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